SURREAL

Surreal Blessings from God's Hand!

Yesterday was one of those days that are hard to explain.

Maybe you've had one, I'm sure most everyone has.

You NEVER expect it, you don't ever think about it...

but when it happens you look back and say "Wow, the things

 that took place today, made me think God opened His hand and dropped these beautiful 

gifts into my day!"

Unbelievable.

Without any planning at all, my replacement for work was hired today!

(I will be leaving work mid-June to move to China)

Unbelievable!

Without me letting ANYONE know that I had been searching for a significant

way to be connected to my granddaughter.

With so much distance between us, I want her to know

that I am thinking of her so much and that I love her and pray for her.

So today, God used one of our patients to share with

me what she does to stay connected to her

long distance granddaughter!

This patient had no clue how I had been struggling to come up with some

way to share something special with my granddaughter over the years!

Unbelievable!

And the third sweet "SURREAL" thing that happened in the same day:

I went to the store to pick up a few things and a young man

that works there that is always full of joy was working.

I always run into him and we always chat for a moment.

Today was different.

He said to me in a somewhat 

louder voice,

"Praise Jesus, can I get an Amen!"

I said to him, "That's something I will always give!"

Praise JESUS!

Unbelievable!

Sensitivity to my idolatry

Almost everywhere at all times fasting has held a place of great importance since it is closely linked with the intimate sense of religion. Perhaps this is the explanation for the demise of fasting in our day. When the sense of God diminishes, fasting disappears.

-Edward Farrell

I am regularly asking my Father for a fierce and intense ever-increasing LOVE for Him!

There is nothing else in my life as important as this.

Not my hubby, my children, my granddaughter, my parents, my job, my money, my house, my stuff....

nothing.

absolutely nothing can compare to the love I want for my Savior!

I want to go into the depths and love Him as never before.

I will keep asking Him.

I will keep pursuing Him.

I want to keep being homesick for Him!

A visit to remember

The most special things to me this Easter:

Dan and Cara came in from CA for a week!

Glenn and I both took vacation time!

The weather was wonderful with some warmth and sun and
some beautiful snow that Cara and Dan had been longing to see!

Family and old friends in our home Easter Day to share love and laughter!

Playing Sequence and Po-Keeno with much laughter!

Dan and Glenn shooting out back at the shooting range!

Dan and Cara shooting out back at the shooting range!

Cara FINALLY getting diagnosed!

Going to The Strip and Station Square for the day!

Cara helping me "pretty up" my blog!

Skyping together with Brent, Christy and Madeline!

Stopping by to see Scout and loving on him a bit!

BUT THE BEST BY FAR:

My son-in-law, who by the way has such a tender heart, was led by the
Holy Spirit to prepare a wonderful Good Friday reflection study for us
to share together!

And, through issues that the evil one was attempting to orchestrate so
to damage our desire for wonderful relationships....GOD was victorious
and increased our communication and godly bond with one another!

HALLELUJAH!

Beautiful Reflecting

With Easter brings newness!

Even though I celebrate the idea of this beautiful season everyday, there is still 

something amazingly wonderful about having a day to actually have on the

calendar to share what Jesus did and to reflect what happened two thousand years ago.   

To also think deeply about possibly what Jesus went through that whole week leading

up to His crucifixion.

A sweet unexpected gift our family received this Good Friday was my son-in-law

having it on his heart to prepare a time of reflection from God's Word of what

Jesus endured during this time.  It was unforgettable and I will always remember

this Good Friday night for the Good Friday's to come in the future.

This time together really had I focus more on what Jesus must have felt about

what was going on at the time.  The loneliness He must have felt, the anguish,

the idea that He knew He had to endure the beatings, the floggings, the spitting,

the cruelty...for there was no other way that we could escape eternal separation

from God!  He was the only Way!  He loved us enough to take on all of this

for me.

spiritual eyesight

I love so many many things about my Father.

One of the most absolutely beautiful things of Him

is His way of giving me the ability in my spirit to see with spiritual eyes.

This morning I was blessed to see with this eyesight in a way that humbled me so.

The hardest thing was containing the joy from what I was seeing!

I can say, honestly without a doubt, that this journey towards China

has continually blessed my soul.

I would never want to go back before it all began!

I choose to fiercely live in my birthright!

I am truly humbled!

I get to go to China!

A 360

The term "360" is on my mind and heart these days.

It's because of what God is teaching me in trusting Him fully in everything.

When I naturally tend to look at the circumstances that cause me to doubt and begin
to step away from fully trusting in the FAITHFUL ONE, in God's strength I do a 360!

I move my glimpse of the material to a gaze onto my FATHER'S face!
There I choose to linger upon the ONE I believe and know can do ANYTHING
regardless of any type of circumstance!

This material world is not my home and soon it will pass away.
I refuse to put my trust in something that will not last.
My trust resides in the One True Creator of all and daily I am
learning to turn about when the first hint of doubt appears and
do a 360 and focus on Jesus' face and BELIEVE!

In the school of FAITH

I consistently ask my Father for His equipping in preparation for going to Asia.
Only the Spirit has given me the wisdom to know to ask for this and I am fiercely
pursuing the understanding and the supernatural ability of faith.

Only by the grace of Him am I unlocking new treasured understandings of this single word.

I have to say this has been the most treasured find so far:

True faith is a radical departure from the status quo, a renewal of personal conviction despite all contradictions and a recognition of UNCERTAINTY. Without a recognition of uncertainty, faith has no meaning. The strength of true faith is that it acknowledges that uncertainty exists, and yet still forges on in spite of the uncertainty, willingly accepting and embracing the consequences of conviction in the face of uncertainty. There is not fear that the conviction may be misled and flinching because of the uncertainty, there is a recognition that this lack of absolute rational proof and certainty is what gives faith its supreme virtue. This is what makes faith courageous and is something that only mortal humans can do, since angels are blessed with absolute knowledge whereas humans are blessed with uncertainty, which is the only way that true freedom can exist. Without this freedom, the choice of "faith" would not be possible, would not be courageous, and would not make mortals eligible for the reward of heaven.   (taken from a review of Soren Kierkegaard's, Fear and Trembling)


To Kierkegaard the human experience is that of making choices; perceiving something objectively does not require a decision or commitment, and as such it cannot really be called existing. However, when uncertainty is present, the individual must take charge of his or her life and make a decision whether to believe or not. "The greater the uncertainty - the greater the risk the believer takes in believing - the greater the faith," and there's really nothing that takes more belief, more faith, than Christianity, which is not just irrational, but in fact a paradox (Anderson 52). "When the paradox is paradoxical in itself, it repels the individual by virtue of its absurdity, and the corresponding passion of inwardness is faith" (Anderson 53). 

I am LIVING IN PRAISE of all that my Father is giving me the ability to understand and to see around me.
I can feel His continual equipping in my spirit!  HALLELUJAH!!

No one can understand Abraham, for the entire act occurred within him, between him and God. Kierkegaard writes "Abraham cannot be mediated; in other words, he cannot speak. As soon as I speak I express the universal, and if I do not do so, no one can understand me." Abraham of course cannot express himself in the universal, ethical sense, because "he has no higher expression of the universal that ranks above the universal he violates." Abraham performs the ultimate act of faith: he risks everything, and then by virtue of that risk, of his faith, he gets it all back. It makes no sense at all, but that is how religion operates, according to Kierkegaard. Even believing the story of Abraham requires an act of faith, for "the observer cannot understand him at all; neither can his eye rest upon him with confidence." But while having faith is tremendously difficult, Kierkegaard stands in awe of it: "to be able to lose one's reason, and therefore the whole of finiteness of which reason is the broker, and then by the virtue of the absurd to gain precisely the same finiteness - that appalls my soul, but I do not for this cause say that it is something lowly, since on the contrary it is the only prodigy (Anderson 60)." (Philosophic 271).
It is difficult to find flaws with Kierkegaard's argument and description of religion, since he is not speaking in rational terms, and not trying to convince his audience through the methods of logic. He does seem to be taking faith as a prima-facie good, and since the whole of his argument basically stems from the idea that faith is inherently worthwhile and beneficial, it's a bit of shaky ground to be on. But that's not really the point: faith, like Abraham's situation, cannot be mediated, simply because it is by definition irrational and inexplicable

I know what it is to gain something by giving something up, and I know how you have to lose yourself in order to find yourself.   It's all subjective and it's all irrational, and it's something you cannot explain.  That in itself, is absolutely wonderous!

This has been my current schooling and I am totally dependent upon my Father for this kind of supernatural FAITH!  He is my teacher and I desperately want what He is teaching me.

Father, HELP me shout the GOOD NEWS!